I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
im holly from the hills drunk
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
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