Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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