So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Randomize
