dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I believe in your delicious
Randomize