that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
