I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
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