She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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