i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Let's paint friendship bongs
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
