Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
