Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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