He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
