I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
