If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize