I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Randomize
