dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
