So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize