He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
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