And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
