I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
