It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
