I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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