it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
