the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
