I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Randomize
