an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
