I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
