Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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