So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
