You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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