thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
