Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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