He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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