Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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