Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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