I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I think I am morally bankrupt
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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