oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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