No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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