Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize