More tranny stories later!
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
