Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
