You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
You ruined the universe
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
