Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
