pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
