Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
