Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
