You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
