Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Randomize
