i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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