Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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