I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
